15 Thing Friday: Airplane Edition!

1. Yes, you read that correctly... I am blogging on an airplane. Thank you, smart people, for inventing an app that allows me to obsess over my ridiculous blog even when I'm not on the ground! Now if only I could add pictures with snarky captions instead of needing to put them in later. Uggggh, my life is super hard and full of work.

2. Speaking of work... Today's interaction with my coworkers was, as seems to be the usual, more of this:

3. This is my fourth flight this month. For someone who is terrified of heights, doesn't love flying, and SERIOUSLY hates airports... This is a little excessive. Luckily, I'm going to Disney World. If I was going somewhere not Disney related, chances are I'd shank someone with my knitting needles before the flight was over.

Miss Chubby Cheeks throwing down some airplane sass. And... zombie David?

4. Unluckily for me, I'm going to go work. I have a few free days for fun and games, but mostly I'm going to be telling a whole lot of bad jokes and trying not to slip and fall on my own sweat. Seriously, it's supposed to be in the high 80s the whole time I'm there. Florida: WTF?!!

5. As if one workplace rampage wasn't enough, I'm most likely walking into another one on this trip. One of the newer skippers is furious with me for "taking her hours" because I took a shift that another skipper wanted to give away, but she wanted it. Apparently this girl has never heard the sayings "the early bird gets the worm," "you snooze, you lose," or "not my problem." Somehow I didn't realize taking an available shift was a crime, but she has sent me several angry Facebook messages so I am well aware that she believes it is. Ah, Facebook... Making passive aggressive behavior easier and more annoying since 2004.

6. This is what I'm currently staring at. Get ready, it's pretty thrilling.

Not thrilled yet? Me neither.

7. When I was in eighth grade, we had to take these long surveys about ourselves and at the end, we got a list of suggested careers that were based on our answers. The top two careers it suggested for me were performer and flight attendant. Welp... Guess we know why I ended up as a theatre major.

8. A man has been playing video games at max volume for nearly two hours now. Sir, the airplane isn't that big. And I still have those knitting needles primed and ready for shanking.

8. I do hope you're enjoying the exquisite photography of today's 15 Things. Please note that in my eighth grade survey, it clearly said "performer" and not "artist."

9. I have my iPod on shuffle, which is something I try out maybe twice a year. It never fails to remind me how lazy I am, because I think I only listen to and appreciate 1/4 of what is on this sucker. Why don't I delete this nonsense? Oh wait. I'm lazy. That's right.

10. Speaking of lazy... I meant to go for a run this morning. When that didn't happen, I told myself I'd run after work. Would anyone like to venture a guess as to whether or not that happened?

11. They just announced that we will be arriving in Florida almost an entire half hour early. Good job, flight crew, you saved innocent people from my knitting needle wrath.

12. Unfortunately, we're still not getting in early enough for Earl of Sandwich. Forgive me, holiday sandwich... We will be together soon.

13. I definitely have not been fantasizing about what I'm going to eat for dinner the entire flight. Because obviously I'm starving to death... The bacon cheeseburger I had for lunch and the Ritz crackers and peanut I inhaled an hour ago just aren't cutting it. Exactly how long can I ride on the half marathon coattails?

14. While fantasizing about dinner, I've also been skimming the October issue of Shape... Clearly looking at a fitness magazine burns the same calories as actually doing the workouts. I'm always entertained at how easy fitness magazines make getting in shape sound. This issue claims the following: "1 Move + 2 Minutes = Sexy Abs."

Oh yeah? So if I do this for two minutes, I'll have sexy abs? Please, Shape... 15 reps of that wouldn't even burn off the cheese on my bacon cheeseburger.

15. We are about to land and I am completely exhausted. Thank God I'm not one of those people that gets too tired to eat. I'd get out of a coma for food.


16. I did this whole thing on my phone. Seriously, iPhone, I pledge my eternal love to you. You have my heart forever.

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