Running with Pixie Dust

But I'm trying not to beat myself up for relaxing today because it's been a rough few weeks (months, really) and I'm trying to be better about taking care of myself.  I've gotten into a bad habit of thinking that the only way to take care of myself is to push myself into workouts and try to pack as much into every day as possible and while there are definite benefits to that, I realized I was on a very quick path to burn out.  So it's okay that my biggest accomplishments today will be an hour long run, a few online reviews, and a blog post.

I know I have a lot of catching up to do since my last post was in July.  The long and short of it is that life got very crazy in lots of great and a few really tough ways.  There were some days and weeks in the past few months that I didn't see an end in sight and I thought there was no light at the end of the tunnel.  There were some days I felt very depressed and very desperate.  I am very happy to say that I think I've turned a corner, though, and the world seems right again.

Among other things, Jamie and I signed a lease on a new place together and will be moving in very soon.  It's a big step, but I think it's a good one.  To save my sanity (and allow me to keep all my stuff like a good little hoarder) we signed a lease on a two bedroom.  It's a really lovely place and I'm really excited about it.  Plus, he's got some great job prospects up ahead, so life is good there.  I finished training to be a VIP Tour Guide (!!!) and I start a three-week stint with that team in just a few days.  Lots of exciting stuff!

But I suppose I should go take out that trash now... here goes nothing.

Seriously.  These workouts are amazing.  I am planning to do a full review of each one individually as I get more comfortable with them.  I originally bought 30 Minutes to Fitness: Weights based on the reviews it had gotten.  I did it twice and was so happy with it that I went back and bought several more of her DVDs.  They are all fantastic.  She has a very no-nonsense style that I appreciate - she's not barking commands at me like Jillian Michaels, she's not flexing her own muscles and bragging like Tony Horton.  And while I truly love Chalene Johnson in all her Turbo glory, she is sometimes a little too much of a peppy cheerleader for me.  Kelly Coffey-Meyer is just there to workout, which is all I need right now.  And in 30 minutes, she makes me work very hard, but I don't feel dead at the end. 

Specific reviews to come, but now I have to change out of my sweaty clothes and work on that kinda sorta social life.  Good evening, blogging world!

I can't even lie about it - that was one of the best burgers I've ever eaten.  Whoever thought of putting fried cheese on a burger is my hero.  The burger was amazing, the bacon was amazing, the cheese was amazing... my hands were shiny because of all the grease, but I don't even care.  I can't begin to fathom how many Weight Watchers PointsPlus values I consumed in devouring that thing (yes, I absolutely ate the entire burger) so I think I'll just track it as 30 and move on.

Haylee and I had lunch about 2:30 and when it came time to get ready for my run at about 7:30, I was still full.  Really full.  I have no idea how I got through my run, especially with the heat, but even after a three mile run, I am still full.  Logan's Roadhouse, what kind of sorcery are you performing?!  And more importantly... when can I see you again?!

So maybe "Running with Pixie Dust" isn't the most accurate name that I could have given this blog.  Is it too late to sell my domain and buy "Running with Fried Cheese" instead?

But in lieu of pitching a fit about HOW MUCH I HATE IT WHEN GUYS THINK THEY CAN OGLE ME WHILE I'M RUNNING... I thought it would be much better to bring back a tradition that I stole from the beautiful Janae.  The Triple Tangent Tuesday!

1.  I am horribly addicted to a game called Fish out of Water.  You throw fish across the water and see how far they will go and how many times you can make them skip on the surface.  It is as dumb as it sounds, but I cannot stop playing it.  I completely drained my iPad battery playing it.  It's bad.

2.  In trying to create that image (which took much longer than it should have because I have issues), I went to Picnik and had a near panic attack when I was reminded that there is no more Picnik.  How could I add text to all of my pictures?!  How could I make them more fun and entertaining for a blog that probably no one reads anymore?!  Then I consulted Lord Google and found out about Ribbet.  Crisis averted, everyone!

3.  I have decided that I need to completely overhaul my wardrobe.  I have also decided that I need to monogram everything in sight.  It is becoming a problem, especially because I really enjoy working 32 to 36 hours a week.  I kid about marrying money, but seriously... it might be my best option.  Sorry, Jamie.  Regardless, the following are things that I have decided I absolutely must have.

This monogrammed boyfriend tank in every color.  I feel like the monogram makes it super classy and adorable, so it distracts from the fact that really, I just want to live in unisex tank tops all summer.

This monogrammed boyfriend tank in every color.  You may be noticing a trend here.  But look!  This one is different!  It has a bow and Lilly Pulitzer!  So obviously I need to buy every color from both sellers.

ALL of the Land's End totes.  I have one and now I want 15 more.  Why do I want more?  One should be plenty.  But it's not.

And that's it.  I got followed by some creepers, I am obsessed with a game of throwing fish, and I want monogrammed everything.  Goodnight!

Today I ran 3 miles.  Yesterday I ran 3 miles.  No idea where this surge of running energy has come from, but I am hoping it sticks around.  The plan was to run 3 miles today and then go to a yoga class at the gym.  But then Dunkin' Donuts caramel iced coffee, my couch, and Say Yes to the Dress happened.  So no yoga class.  I am planning on forcing myself into my swimsuit later to do some laps in the pool.  I haven't been swimming in a while and I kind of miss it.

It's my day off today, so I have a nice to-do list of things I need to get done.  Doing the dishes is on there, as is cleaning my apartment.  So is swimming.  Shockingly, neither online shopping nor fantasizing about the Sperry Top Sider watch that I saw at TJ Maxx two days ago made it onto the to-do list.  And yet, what am I doing...?  To be fair, there is some pretty great online shopping happening.  I have recently discovered a website called Look Human that sells fantastic shirts.  They are currently having a sale on tank tops and since it is approaching summer here in Florida (also known as the hottest circle of hell) tank tops are a necessity.  Things that may have to be purchased today, despite the fact that I have no money and a Comcast bill due:

I like running...

Exercise gives you endorphins...

Dear Lord...

Disregard the fact that I literally just complained to Jamie the other day that I hate my wardrobe and since I am nearly 27 years old (!!!) it is time for me to dress like a mature woman.  A mature woman would have a neon tank top with a movie quote on it, right?  And I know a mature woman would thank the good Lord for men in tight pants.  That's a thing.

Eeep.  I think it's time for me to stop.  I have more mature woman things to do like microwave some hot dogs for lunch.  In retrospect... maybe I should have gone with the "I'm back" post.  It would have been less embarrassing than this mess.

Really, that is about it.  After Body Pump, I picked up a super healthy dinner for Jamie and I and we ate slowly, discussing how our day went, and then we did some restorative yoga and meditated.  HA!  Just kidding!  I picked up chicken tenders and mac and cheese from Publix, nuked some frozen sweet corn, and we shoved it all in our faces while watching Dr. Who.  Please.

Seriously, though.  I am feeling really good right now.  For someone who has been really lax in the daily exercise department, getting myself to do something active every single day has been an impressive feat.  This is what my workouts have looked like this week.

Saturday: I went for a 350 meter swim, which is more than I have done in a while!

Sunday: I went to Body Pump!  I am trying to get back into going to Body Pump at least twice a week.

Monday: I went for a three mile run!

Tuesday: I am most proud of this one.  I did NOT want to exercise yesterday.  I walked a lot at work and when I got home, I was not feeling well.  I lounged around for a while, then Jamie and I got subs from Publix and watched Dr. Who together.  This means that I was comfy on his couch and full of delicious sub when I decided that I would not ruin my 100 day challenge on day 4 because that was stupid.  So I got off the couch, came back to my place, got into my workout clothes, and did a 20 minute Zumba DVD.  Take that, laziness!

I have also tracked every day since Saturday, so that means five consecutive days of tracking!  I will admit that I have still made a few questionable choices - Doritos jumped into my grocery cart last night and Chick-fil-a waffle fries randomly appeared next to me this afternoon.  But the whole point of Weight Watchers is that you track it and move on.  I will never be perfect with food.  I know this.  It has taken me a long time and I have beaten myself up often about it because I would love to be one of those people who honestly believes that nothing tastes as good as thin feels.  I would love to be one of those people who stops eating junk food and never wants it ever again.  My abs would look great.  But I love food so much!  I love Doritos and I love waffle fries and I love this croissant donut that you can get at Epcot.  I dream of that thing.  So I cannot keep expecting myself to "eat clean" - I am not a clean eating girl.  I am a "track it and move on" kind of girl.

I also simply did not eat very well all day today.  I have been starting every day with a green smoothie, but today was a stressful day and there were no fruits or vegetables involved in my breakfast. 

I had a very early morning today because I taught the Magic Kingdom Orientation class for the first time in months, and I was so anxious about it because I was sure I would forget the whole thing.  Luckily, I had a good co-facilitator who helped me out a lot, but I still felt a little drained by the end of class.  Then this afternoon, I met with my co-facilitator for Traditions, which is the first day any Cast Member has at Disney.  It's a huge honor to facilitate Traditions.  You have to go through several auditions and you only teach for one year.  I was lucky enough to be chosen for the 2014 team, and while I am incredibly excited to teach my very first class this Saturday, I AM SO NERVOUS.  My co-facilitator is great, though, and sitting down with him for a while today really helped.  But you can imagine after needing to study two scripts in one day and walking around the Magic Kingdom for several hours this morning, I was in no mood to do anything this afternoon.  I got home from studying for Traditions and got right into bed.  But just like yesterday, I didn't want to ruin my challenge.  I got out of bed and got into my running clothes because I told myself I would only go out for a short 2 mile run.  A crazy thing happened on that short run, though - I wanted to keep going.  So instead of doing just 2 miles, I went for 3 miles, and I was really stupid proud of myself!

That being said, I think my early morning is suddenly catching up to me now because I can hear my pillows calling my name.  Tomorrow is another day of work and the plan is for another Body Pump class!  That will make one week of exercising every day!  100 day challenge, I am coming for you.

6 days down, 94 to go

One of the rare moments where I was not weeping openly.

I became a Magic Kingdom Tour Guide and was trained in three separate tours - Keys to the Kingdom, Family Magic, and Walt Disney: Marceline to Magic Kingdom.

The day I received my riding crop and gave my very first Keys to the Kingdom tour.

I ran the inaugural Disneyland 10K and the Disneyland Half and took Jamie to Disneyland for his very first time.  I also drank all of the mint juleps I could, but I'm not sure if that is really a point of pride...

Jamie going into Sleeping Beauty Castle for the very first time.  I love this picture.

Okay, but seriously... I dream of this drink.

I was selected as a member of the 2014 Traditions Team.  For Disney Cast Members, this is a big deal.  Traditions is the very first class you take as a Cast Member and it is taught (we like to say it is facilitated) by other Disney Cast Members.  It is a tough team to get on and you are only a member of the team for one year, so you have to relish it for that year.  I went through several rounds of auditions and interviews before I was selected - 2014 will be my year to enjoy!

The day I found out I was on the team.  We all got special Traditions ears!

I also got to spend a good amount of time with my family, which was wonderful because I miss my them a lot now that I'm here in Florida.  I had some great times with friends in 2013 and made a lot of memories.  But 2013 was also a really difficult year for me.  I faced a lot of personal challenges and setbacks, and there were times that I felt like giving up on everything in Florida and moving home.  I am very pleased to say that my outlook is much brighter now and I am excited for what awaits this year.

There is one thing that I really need to do this year, though, and that's why I'm back here.  The stress of 2013, both from great things and from not so great things, took a toll on me.  I stopped taking care of myself the way I know I should.  I didn't get enough sleep, I exercised sporadically, and my eating was out of control.  I tried to take control of the situation - I went back to Weight Watchers in February and started going to meetings again.  But I couldn't find a meeting I loved, so I stopped going.  I would start tracking and following the plan again and be great for a few days, then get completely derailed and stay off track for a week.  I wanted to lose weight, I wanted it so much, but I couldn't stay on track, and then I got frustrated and beat myself up for losing control.  It was a horrible cycle and before I knew it, I stepped on a scale and was almost back to my original starting weight for Weight Watchers.

You'd think that all of this would be enough - that seeing a number that high on the scale would be my breaking point.  But it wasn't.  I kept spiraling.  And then today happened.  Today I ran the inaugural 10K here in Walt Disney World.  I was slow, but I've always been slow.  What killed me were the pictures.  When I left my house this morning, I thought I looked so cute all done up in my Minnie Mouse gear.  And while I still think I look pretty good for having just run a 10K, when I realized how big I had gotten, my heart sunk.

The difference between the pictures today and the picture from 2012 is about 30 pounds.  And it stops here.  I am blogging today to say that 2014 will be my year.  It is my Traditions year, and it will be the year that I get back to my goal weight and STAY THERE.  My life changed when I moved to Florida - I got a new job, I was in a new relationship, and things I relied on back home (a great Weight Watchers meeting and summers you can run in, for example) went away.  I used those things as excuses for too long.  The truth is, I'm settled into my job now, Jamie and I are comfortable together, and I am as used to running in Florida heat as I ever will be.  

I saw a very inspiring video that you can see here that got me thinking.  I keep starting a plan, starting a routine, starting Weight Watchers again... and then giving up.  What if I gave it 100 days?  I did the math and it turns out that if I commit to 100 days, it gets me to just about a week before my birthday.  I think weight loss would be one of the best birthday gifts I could give myself, so I am doing it.

Tomorrow will be day one of 100, and my goals are simple: