Friday, January 10, 2014

Why 2014 needs to be my year.

Well... it's been a while blogging world.  And I am hanging my head in shame as I come back to you.  For one thing, I meant to start blogging again on January 1st (for obvious reasons) and here it is, January 10th.  For another thing, I have promised countless times that I will be a better blogger and have continued to fail pretty impressively.
But I am back and I need to be back.  Blogging kept me accountable.  It's part of why I started this blog.  And I need to be held accountable right now more than I have in a long time.
To be honest, 2013 was a rough year.  Now don't get me wrong - some pretty amazing things happened.  I ran a marathon and while I did definitely cry for several miles, I lived through it!
One of the rare moments where I was not weeping openly.

I became a Magic Kingdom Tour Guide and was trained in three separate tours - Keys to the Kingdom, Family Magic, and Walt Disney: Marceline to Magic Kingdom.

The day I received my riding crop and gave my very first Keys to the Kingdom tour.

I ran the inaugural Disneyland 10K and the Disneyland Half and took Jamie to Disneyland for his very first time.  I also drank all of the mint juleps I could, but I'm not sure if that is really a point of pride...

Jamie going into Sleeping Beauty Castle for the very first time.  I love this picture.

Okay, but seriously... I dream of this drink.

I was selected as a member of the 2014 Traditions Team.  For Disney Cast Members, this is a big deal.  Traditions is the very first class you take as a Cast Member and it is taught (we like to say it is facilitated) by other Disney Cast Members.  It is a tough team to get on and you are only a member of the team for one year, so you have to relish it for that year.  I went through several rounds of auditions and interviews before I was selected - 2014 will be my year to enjoy!

The day I found out I was on the team.  We all got special Traditions ears!

I also got to spend a good amount of time with my family, which was wonderful because I miss my them a lot now that I'm here in Florida.  I had some great times with friends in 2013 and made a lot of memories.  But 2013 was also a really difficult year for me.  I faced a lot of personal challenges and setbacks, and there were times that I felt like giving up on everything in Florida and moving home.  I am very pleased to say that my outlook is much brighter now and I am excited for what awaits this year.

There is one thing that I really need to do this year, though, and that's why I'm back here.  The stress of 2013, both from great things and from not so great things, took a toll on me.  I stopped taking care of myself the way I know I should.  I didn't get enough sleep, I exercised sporadically, and my eating was out of control.  I tried to take control of the situation - I went back to Weight Watchers in February and started going to meetings again.  But I couldn't find a meeting I loved, so I stopped going.  I would start tracking and following the plan again and be great for a few days, then get completely derailed and stay off track for a week.  I wanted to lose weight, I wanted it so much, but I couldn't stay on track, and then I got frustrated and beat myself up for losing control.  It was a horrible cycle and before I knew it, I stepped on a scale and was almost back to my original starting weight for Weight Watchers.

You'd think that all of this would be enough - that seeing a number that high on the scale would be my breaking point.  But it wasn't.  I kept spiraling.  And then today happened.  Today I ran the inaugural 10K here in Walt Disney World.  I was slow, but I've always been slow.  What killed me were the pictures.  When I left my house this morning, I thought I looked so cute all done up in my Minnie Mouse gear.  And while I still think I look pretty good for having just run a 10K, when I realized how big I had gotten, my heart sunk.



The picture with Donald is heartbreaking to me, but if I want to use this blog to be accountable, then I feel like I better be completely honest.  To put this in perspective, this is a picture I took after one of my first runs here in Florida.  This was June 2012.


The difference between the pictures today and the picture from 2012 is about 30 pounds.  And it stops here.  I am blogging today to say that 2014 will be my year.  It is my Traditions year, and it will be the year that I get back to my goal weight and STAY THERE.  My life changed when I moved to Florida - I got a new job, I was in a new relationship, and things I relied on back home (a great Weight Watchers meeting and summers you can run in, for example) went away.  I used those things as excuses for too long.  The truth is, I'm settled into my job now, Jamie and I are comfortable together, and I am as used to running in Florida heat as I ever will be.  

I saw a very inspiring video that you can see here that got me thinking.  I keep starting a plan, starting a routine, starting Weight Watchers again... and then giving up.  What if I gave it 100 days?  I did the math and it turns out that if I commit to 100 days, it gets me to just about a week before my birthday.  I think weight loss would be one of the best birthday gifts I could give myself, so I am doing it.

Tomorrow will be day one of 100, and my goals are simple:
  • Track what I eat and drink every single day.
  • Do some sort of exercise every single day.
  • Forgive myself if I slip up and get right back on track with a positive mindset.
I will be blogging for the 100 days in an effort to keep myself committed and motivated.  Right now, 100 days seems very daunting... but I have faith that this will be a great thing.  So here's to 2014 - let's start it off right!

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1 comment:

  1. I check in on several blogs throughout my week and I find yours to be one of the most refreshing and honest ones. Keep you head up, 2014 is going to be amazing! Looking forward to reading more about your journey.

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